Conquer Your Fears

27.08.24

Yesterday, I faced one of my biggest fears, I played an original song in front of a live audience. It was a very surreal experience and I confess I was extremely nervous. In the middle of the song, I almost teared up a little. I’ve been meaning to do something different so before I change my mind, I’ll show you a 2-minute clip, and then we’ll discuss the lyrics and how they relate to the shadow integration process and the individuation journey.

Watch me singing here:

I hope you enjoyed the song, I’ll be honest and say that I can spot many flaws and wanted to have an immaculate performance, but this moment wasn’t about being perfect, as this is just an illusion. This moment was about me having the courage to face my fears and be truthful to my soul.

From time to time, I like to pick one of my favorite artists and listen to their whole discography. This song came to me after being completely immersed in Chris Cornel’s work for about a whole month. I could feel his pain bleeding through his voice, and how music was the one thing in his life that brought him meaning and hope.

As I explored through Soundgarden, Audioslave, and his solo albums, I got extremely interested in his life story. If you didn’t know, Cris Cornell unalived himself after one last drunk performance, and this moved something within me.

• How come one of the most legendary voices on the planet couldn’t find a reason to stay here?

Is It Worth It?

The impact of his music and all of my questions turned into his song. Now let’s discuss the lyrics.

“My heart bleeds, hoping to find what can alleviate the pain. My singing comes from the soul, from my fingers comes the life”. “Is it enough to find my way or will I always wander in pain?”

• I start with a simple metaphor to illustrate how an artist creates with his hands and I question if art and music are enough to bring hope and meaning.

“Maybe, there’s a chance to solve the riddle of time. Here or a memory, only fragments of life”.

• Experiencing neurosis or trauma, as Carl Jung states, is essentially a self-division. We’re fragmented and have no clear idea about who are. Furthermore, there are parts of us that remain trapped in the past tinged by guilt and regret, and we’re rarely present.

“Maybe, that’s the secret, the heart blending with the spirit. God is present when the sweet melody of the soul, summons him”.

• The heart blending with the spirit refers to solving this self-division and bringing integration. The union of intellect and emotion, the spiritual realm and the body, the Eros and Logos. In Jungian Psychology, we call it the symbol formation process. Moreover, art and music, are one of the few things that allow us to experience this deep union and reach the Self.

“Is it worth it? Is it worth it? The price is high when your soul is on the line. In every tear, remember, you’re gonna die”.

• In other words, is it worth it to just wander through life and waste our talents in meaningless pursuits? Remember, our time is finite and it’s up to us to craft our own values and create our unique sense of meaning.

Individuation and The Creative Process

To me, the creative process is directly linked to the individuation journey and the shadow integration process. Whenever we’re attempting to create something new, we have to face self-doubt, and we’re crucified between truly listening to our souls and thinking about how other people are going to receive our art.

We have to make a choice between allowing our authentic selves to bleed into our creations or trying to fit certain parameters. The inner critic rises and paralyzes us. We can’t help but wonder what our parents, partners, or friend group, are going to think about what we’re doing.

If we’re not resolute, we’re engulfed by this pressure and lose touch with our souls. The individuation journey is about finding our truth, and crafting our own values, instead of operating with assumptions and being a hostage to other people’s standards.

Many people resist this task, as following our hearts immediately puts us in a vulnerable position. We’re stepping into the unknown and lose the comfortable illusion of blaming our parents or society for our results. Following our authentic paths requires taking full responsibility.

Just as when we’re learning music, we can draw inspiration from amazing musicians, and learn their songs, and playing styles. However, there comes a moment in which we have to individuate and find our unique voice. Otherwise, we’ll always be hiding in the shadow of someone else.

This has many forms, like constantly trying to win the approval of your parents and following their life’s script, settling for a mediocre job because you’re afraid to go after what you truly want, or taking ownership of other people’s work instead of creating your own.

“Resistance is The Enemy Within” – Steven Pressfield

However, what few people realize is that the individuation journey isn’t abstract, it requires skin in the game. Practical changes must be made in real life to follow what’s in our hearts. In my experience as a therapist, people always know what they truly want for their lives, however, they allow fear to get in the way and the poisonous desire for comfort.

The moment you decide to move forward, you’re bound to face what Steven Pressfield calls Resistance, that part of us that wants to remain childish, run away from responsibility, and give in to victim mentality. In the words of Steven Pressfield, “Resistance is the enemy within”. What a great way to refer to the shadow!

But we must realize that this opposing force only appears when what we’re trying to accomplish is truly valuable, we wouldn’t feel this overwhelming pressure if it was unimportant. The way I found to deal with fear is truly committing to my craft and to my vision.

Shadow Integration

Steven Pressfield makes a very interesting analogy in The War of Art between living your life as an amateur or a pro. In other words, how committed are you to creating a life you’re proud of and developing your skills vs. always finding the perfect excuse to avoid the hard work.

This perfectly aligns with the shadow integration process because most people approach this endeavor in a completely passive way. I must tell you that you’ll never integrate the shadow by filling shadow work prompts or doing weird meditations.

The repressed aspects of our personalities only come to life when we engage with them. We must give our blood, time, and space in real life. In other words, if the creative aspect of the unconscious wants to be manifested, we must engage with it daily.

It’s our duty to develop a work ethic and hone our skills to shape this vision. Many people like to play with the unconscious, dreams, and shadow work, but they never take it seriously. As soon as they find something valuable, they dismiss it.

Why? … Because every time we seek guidance from the Self our responsibility increases. If we have dormant talents, our souls won’t rest and will create conflict after conflict until we decide to listen to and commit to our authentic paths.

Barbara Hannah says “It took Jung many years, for he was not satisfied with learning to see the images of the unconscious, or even with dealing with them actively in his fantasies. He did not feel at ease until he took “the most important step of all”: finding their place and purpose” in his own actual outer life. This, he says, the most important step in active imagination, is “what we usually neglect to do. Insight into the myth of our unconscious, must be converted into ethical obligation” (Barbara Hannah – Encounters With The Soul – p. 25).

I had many dreams and active imagination experiences in which I was presented with a sword and I had to wield it. Upon investigation, I understood that this was a symbol for the logos, the verb, and the written word. I knew I was being called to write and couldn’t run away from it.

Of course, I had many doubts and thought I’d never be able to write anything worthy, however, I decided to trust my soul and persevered. It was my duty to shape the expression of my soul as best as I could. As you can see, this is no simple task, I completely rearranged my schedule, changed my habits, and even my business structure so I could write as often as possible.

The individuation journey and the shadow integration process aren’t for amateurs, it requires diligence and commitment. The Self reveals our true aspirations and what we’re born to do, however, it’s up to us to answer this calling and concretize it in real life.

Lastly, If you want the best tools and knowledge to help you in your individuation journey, I invite you to join the Audacity University.

You can master Jungian Psychology in 1 year to either become your own analyst or integrate it into your coaching/ therapeutic practice.

Rafael Krüger – Live an Audacious Life

Whenever you’re ready, there are 4 ways I can help you:

• Katabasis – The Shadow Integration Manual – My best-selling and accessible course will introduce you to all you need to know to disrupt the unconscious patterns keeping you stuck.
• Audacity University – My flagship course contains a  4-year psychology curriculum and gives you access to the Audacity Inner Circle and live meetings.
• Obliterate Procrastination – Master your habits, unleash motivation, and unlock the flow state.
• Mentorship – Catalyze your personal transformation with 1 on 1 sessions. Master your psychology, relationships, and business.